Good ol' America

I'm sitting at my gate in the Tokyo airport as I write this post. I am on the way back to Shanghai after spending a great week in the US. The trip's purpose was to get sworn in (look who's a real lawyer now woot woot), but I talked my way into taking a whole week off to make the long trip worthwhile. Overall, the week was amazing. I met up with everyone important to me, and ate and did everything I planned to do. Although I did have to work a little on two days, it was a much needed getaway from the fast-paced life in Shanghai.

Nostalgia is kicking in as I leave America. Having to shift between America and China is not easy for me because I love them both so much. I consider both places home (even though I'm technically not American) and it's always difficult to choose. This trip back, as I drove my old car around town, meeting up with friends, many of whom came all the way to Atlanta for the weekend, it felt as if nothing has changed. And that feels so nice. Living in America is so comfortable. Only being away will make you appreciate things like fast, uncensored internet, real freaking donuts, people who follow traffic rules, not being scammed, etc. Oh, the luxuries of living in the first world...

What I miss the most about the States are my people. Since moving to Shanghai, I have made about 2 friends. Being so busy with work, I haven't really felt lonely. I've actually valued spending weekends alone to recharge for the week ahead. However, being back to America and catching up with everyone was so nice, and it will make me miss having friends when I get back to Shanghai. I miss talking about stupid things. I miss hanging out and laughing a lot. I miss going out. So friends, I will make a bigger effort to stay in touch with you. Let's email, facetime, skype, whatever. If I don't respond on Gchat, it's probably because Gchat failed in China, I'm not ignoring you. If you're interested, get an app called LINE, which I use to keep in touch with some people. We can send each other cute stickers :)

Okay friends, it is time to board again and get back to the craziness of Shanghai. Bye for now!

A hairy situation, and other stuff

Two weeks ago, I woke up one morning and decided that I would entertain the idea of cutting my hair into something Emma Watson/Carey Mulligan-esque. Don't ask me what the trigger was. I have no idea. Although I was intrigued, it was a little daunting seeing that I haven't had short hair since the obligatory Asian bowl-cut way back when. Back then, I absolutely hated short hair and couldn't wait until I was old enough to grow it out. I used to leave a t-shirt on my head and pretend like it was hair and flip it around. Lol.
Anyways, I did my research- Youtube videos of girls getting their hair cut, Pinterest searches for Asian pixie cuts, you name it. I spent shameful amounts of time on this website where you can upload your picture and try out different celebrity haircuts. So fun! After much deliberation, I made my hair appointment.

The haircut itself went really well. I will post pictures at some point. I was pretty nervous going in, but after talking it through with the guy and showing him lots of pictures of what I envisioned, I felt  confident that we were on the same page. The guy was great at communicating and listening, which is not the case with every hairstylist. Isn't it the absolute worst when your hairdresser thinks he knows what you want but actually has no idea? Or when he thinks he knows better than you? I've had both, and yes they were the worst.

All in all, I really love the new look. I think it's different, exciting, and so easy to dry!! I am also learning how to style short hair. I've never used wax, pomade, and all that, but it seems simple enough. Also gives me an excuse to go to the drugstore :)

In other news, the past two weeks have been INSANELY busy. I had to work both days of the weekend :( One of the weekend days until 1am :( Then it got worse during the week. Sigh. But I did get to experience my first deal, from beginning to end, which was very exciting. Too bad it had to be so accelerated, as that was how the deal was structured. I hear we have another deal coming where I may have to fly to Beijing on Monday. Normally I'd be happy to travel to Beijing any chance I get, but I am going home on Friday for my dad's birthday and then off to the States for an awesome week, so two trips to Beijing and a trip to the US in one week is a lot of flying...

I guess a crazy week will only make vacation more blissful :) Can't wait!

US trip

I have booked my tickets to the States and am getting my visa next week! I'm super excited to be back. This is literally my motivation to work hard this month. In my downtime, I have been doing a wee bit of planning, just so I don't forget to do something while I'm there. Who knows when the next time will be?!

So given my love for list-making, here are some things I have thought of so far:

Food stuff: I have an entire week so a good amount of time to eat everything I've missed. I'm hoping to see some people if they're free for dinner, but the must hits are:
- Fat Matt's and other bbq places
- Chipotle
- Jimmy John's
- Mellow Mushroom
- A big juicy burger from anywhere
- Waffle House
- Krispy Kreme (Chinese donuts are just not the same...)
- Korean bbq if possible
- Fried chicken: South City anyone???
- Whole Foods
Pretty much a load of junk besides Whole Foods :)

Shopping: omg. I am already saving to shop there. Bought 5 winter candles online that should be at Kang's by now. They were half off I had to. Must visit:
- Sephora just to browse. I hear Naked 3 palette is out. Also eying a new scent maybe the full bottle Chloe or Jo Malone. I noticed some weird yellow substance in my current rollerball of Chloe so I'm thinking about getting a full size.
- Ulta and Target for the drugstore fix. Particularly, Revlon balm stains are amazingggg I need more.
- Lenox mall: Jcrew, Club Monaco, and been eying some Wayfarers
- Outlet: stuff for the family
- Nordie rack. Oh yes. I hope they have good stuff

Now that I listed everything, it doesn't actually seem like a whole lot. I'm just looking forward to chilling and catching up with people, drinking cheap wine and more good times. See you soon 'murica! <3

A mixed bag

This week started off terribly. Big boss and other senior people came back from the corporate retreat on Monday, and man was he in a FOUL mood. Turns out there was a big fat load of drama. One of the pregnant associates had a miscarriage scare Monday morning. Boss thought it was NBD (probably a misunderstanding) so he didn't want to give the associate time off, which led to a huge row, slamming doors, associate storming off sobbing, the whole nine yards. All this and more led to a huge bitching session at lunch the next day when he was away. It was kind of eye-opening to me. I had no idea that there were so much criticism and unhappiness among the coworkers.

Then, the week took a turn for the worse on Wednesday when a coworker came up to me, acted like she was trying to help me, but actually said all these things that made me feel like I didn't have a future at this place. She was so passive aggressive about it, like everything she said had a double meaning. I left work that day completely drained from all the BS drama at the office. I didn't sleep well that night, and kept playing back in my head what she said and other conversations I've had with people, to make sure I didn't say anything they can use against me. Definitely can't trust anyone here, which is a depressing thought since I was hoping they'd be cool enough to be my friends.

After that low point on Wednesday, I guess there was no way to go but up. I finally spoke to the boss about evaluations and future plans when he was in a good mood (thankfully). I am going back to the States in a month for swear-in! And taking a week long vacation on the side. Woot! So excited to see everyone, eat, shop, hang out, just like old times. It is definitely fuel to keep me going for the rest of the month. Other than that, I got very positive feedback from the boss, so that made me very happy. I feel like I have finally learned how to work with him and anticipate what he wants. He has been giving me more work recently, and staffed me on a deal for our biggest client. I'm excited. It's been a dead tiring week, but I am just happy that it ended on a good note.

Oh and that case of pinot I stress ordered from the wine bar owner on Wednesday should be arriving soon =) The owner's actually kind of cute. And he owns a wine bar. Hmm...

Happy things

This week has been pretty great. My good friend got engaged, all the partners and senior associates gone for annual conference, took a half day off from work and lounged in bed all day... Weeks like these won't come by so often so I am enjoying it to the fullest.

Two things made me especially happy this week. Couple days ago on Buzzfeed I saw a post about spiked hot chocolate. I immediately knew that I needed it. Some of the recipes required a lot of liqueur. All I have is a bottle of Bailey's that my mom told me to gift to a family friend. The guy, being Chinese and knowing that we have gifts for him, was very hard to track down, so after a month of trying to reach him I decided to drink it. Haha. I wanted to make Irish hot cocoa, with whiskey, Guinness and Bailey's, but I only had Bailey's. It was still yummy!

Hot Cocoa Mix, a surprisingly affordable imported good

Finished product. Next time, some marshmallows and whiskey.

It was super easy to make. Just heat milk in a pot (without boiling it), add the hot cocoa mix and stir, like you would make hot chocolate normally. If you want to be fancy and use real chocolate I'm sure it'll taste even better. Then take it off the heat, pour into your mug, and add Bailey's to your heart's desire. I added about 2 shot glasses worth. It has a strong-ish liqueur smell but doesn't taste strong at all. SO GOOD. A mug of that and cheesy Korean drama on a Friday night is just perfection.

The next happy thing, and partly the reason I made spiked hot chocolate, is because my bar results came out that day. And I passed! Yeah! I'm so happy for all my friends who passed as well. I am surrounded by so many smart talented people. Now we can finally put those few months behind us (am I the only one who felt like I couldn't leave those dark days behind until I get the results, just in case I didn't pass?). Now I can start planning my US trip seriously, so excited to see everyone!!!

More plants!

Ever since two of my plants died, I have been wanting to buy some more. And that's what I did on my precious 1-day weekend last week. I went to the same flower market, tried to avoid the same stores in case they remember and ask me about those plants...

I did some research ahead of time for plants that are easy to keep alive. I've been eying succulents, which I saw the last time I was there. I think they're in the cacti family but they're not spiky. They're supposed to be super easy to grow, even in the winter. Another great thing about them is, theoretically, you can break off a leaf, leave it on the soil and it would germinate into a new succulent without much effort on your part.

I came back with a grand total of 5 plants. Clockwise from left: succulent, purple succlent, random easy-to-grow plant, succulent and aloe vera.

I may have gone a little overboard with the succulents, but they are so cheap! I think total for all three was less than 20 bucks. The other two were spur of the moment buys. I've seen people at work with the random plant and it looks quite low maintenance. The aloe is purely for skincare use. Lady at the store said there's no need to water at all!

Without sounding super uncool, I am very excited about these. The only thing I am slightly worried about is I got ambitious and decided to transfer the succulents into pretty pots I've bought (they come in cheap looking plastic pots). I was trying to get them transferred into the new pots, but I wasn't sure how to pack the dirt with their roots so I kind of just stuffed it all in there... In the process some leaves from the purple succulent snapped off so parts of it look bald right now. I'm trying the germination thing with those leaves so we shall see if that actually works.

Will keep you posted xx

Work life balance

When I first started work, I was expecting to be at the office until at least 8pm regularly, and that's on a good day. It's the typical big law experience. Imagine my surprise when people at the office bounced at 6pm on the dot. I was even more surprised when my boss told me to go home if I didn't have any pressing matters. What kind of boss says that?!

In the past month I have realized that this is just how the firm culture is. People leave pretty close to normal business hours regardless of how much work they have. I am totally on board with that as long as I get my paychecks. See, to me law isn't really a passion but a means to an end. I like it enough and am decent at it, but what I really want is to get paid so I can do other fun things, like shop or travel. I care about how successful my career is, just not enough to dedicate my entire life to it.

I admire people who can sacrifice so much for their career, like my boss, the managing partner. He works so hard. He goes to networking functions almost every night after work, responds to emails at all times even on vacation, and wakes up at 5am involuntarily because he thinks about work unconsciously. As a result of his hard work, our office in Shanghai has annual billing hours comparable to our US counterparts, which is almost never the case for firms with foreign offices. But because of his dedication to work, he looks tired and stressed all the time. And his hair is all white even though I think he's barely 50.

I look at him and think, is it worth it??? YOLO man, I'm gonna enjoy it.

Stuff

My schedule for the past week has been weird, thanks to the Chinese government. It was Moon Festival last Thursday so we got Thurs, Fri and Sat off. We work Sunday-Fri, another day off, two more days of work, then a week off, which is nice, but we have another 6 day work week when we come back. The schedule makes no sense and is SO hard to keep track of. I am considering skipping work one day and blaming it on the reds. 

In other news, something nice happened in this long ass week. One of my good friends from college had a baby! I woke up to her text this morning and its kind of made my day. From what I can tell, everything went pretty smoothly. I was a little worried before (something about preggers makes me nervous) but I'm glad she and the baby are fine. She handled the pregnancy so well from beginning to end. Amazing!

My cousin had a baby this summer but it didn't feel as exciting as this. Sorry baby Leo ;) This is my college friend. We're the same age. We used to gossip about who amongst our friends will get married first. And now she's married and has a baby. Holy crap in a bucket. We really are grown ups. When I was a kid, I used to watch all the grown ups and think, man these people are so tall and put together. At some point, we became those people except in no way do I have my life together.

SOOO I wonder who's gonna get married next? Or have babies?? I have yet to attend a friend wedding. Can someone get on that? Maybe a destination wedding, say Hawaii?

Beijing is best

A lot of people laugh when I tell them about the stereotypes for different regions/provinces in China. Beijingers, and people from the north in general, are easy going and straightforward. Southerners, like Shanghainese, are meticulous and good with money. Some provinces are "pure" whereas others are where all the crooks are born. I guess there's nothing like it in the States, besides Southerners being "slow", West Coast hippie surfers, and an all around ridicule of Texans I never really understood.

Particularly deep rooted in China, is the rivalry between Beijing and Shanghai. I of course rep Beijing pretty hard, and you can definitely tell when I talk. Growing up in a place where people talk about Shanghai with a grimace and head shake, I couldn't help but fall into that.

In my limited experience living here, I can see where the stereotypes come from. To an outsider, Shanghainese are very exclusive. People here speak a dialect that is incomprehensible to outsiders. Even if you learn it, locals can tell immediately whether you're an old-timer. Someone actually scoffed at me when I said I wanted to learn some Shanghainese. Geez. They're also known to be snobby. Girls here are more fashionable and have "delicate features" as they say, but they're also high maintenance and difficult to warm up to.

They certainly have biases about Beijingers, too. To them, we're dirty, unsophisticated, sloppy, and someone said we smell like garlic. Pretty much hot mess status.

The garlic thing aside, I could kind of see it. We're kind of a bunch of rascals. We laugh like maniacs and talk like crude tomboys. And we really don't give a f***. I kind of like it. We keep it real, and what's more important than that? So, sorry Shanghai, you're cool but Beijing is best.

New hobby

Something crazy happened to my VPN last week. I'm not sure what happened, and I'm not sure how it fixed itself, but I can finally access my blog again. Yay!

During my hiatus from blogging, I took up a grandma hobby- plants. I was never that into having plants, mainly because of the upkeep required, but also because I've never lived on my own before. Not sure why that was a factor in my decision not to own plants, but now that I live alone, I am all about making my little home pretty. Not to mention, plants can purify the air and collect dust entering the home.

So, last weekend, I set out to Shanghai's flower market to buy me some plants. I ended up getting three plants and one flower for my wine bottle vase (so nifty I know). I'm not sure what two of the plants are called in English, but the other one is mint. Aren't they awesome?

But wait, this is actually a sad story. The guy at the market told me that these plants need to be watered everyday. Being a total noob, I followed his instructions religiously and watered them a lot every morning. I was so proud of myself for remembering. Things were going well for about 5 days, and then out of nowhere two of them died. I think I drowned them in too much water. So sad. Now I am just trying to keep the last one alive.

Fingers crossed xx

TGIF

My first week is finally over. It wasn't perfect, but I had unreasonable expectations. I was hoping everyone at work would like me immediately, be impressed so they can tell boss man, and then everyone will realize that the office can't run without me and I will have a job forever. That didn't happen.

Boss man told people to send him projects so he can review before passing it along, so I waited. Then, he calls me in, has no work for me and tells me (in a nice way) that I can be proactive and ask people for stuff. If I had known that it was okay, I would have done that ages ago!

I am also really affected by this billable hours business. First of all, I have no idea how to use the online program for billing and no one has time to teach me. I don't know what kind of work is billable and what isn't. What about the 20 mins I talk to boss man? Or check my e-mail? Apparently everything has to be recorded. Today, I finally learned the program and spent an hour logging everything from the week. Then I had to log the amount of time I spent logging... 

After logging my hours, I left the office feeling disappointed in my performance this week. I didn't realize how little my week was billable. It is kind of upsetting to see that out of 10 hours I work, only half was billable, the rest unbillable or unaccounted for. And holy crap I am such a slow worker. I spent 7 hours translating a few pages of DD. Granted, it was all technical legalese on stocks options but still! It's so embarrassing to log and I feel like I have so little to show for my day. I see why law firms do things this way now. It's a self-inflicted cycle of guilt, pressure and overtime.

I know I am crazy to expect everything to go perfectly from the get go. I have to keep reminding myself to be okay with the downs of this transition. New focus: get it together this weekend, do some fun things and recharge. Imma rock that bitch next week. YEAH.

It's only Tuesday.

I started my new job on Monday. It's only Tuesday, and I'm exhausted. It's kind of sad to say that sitting in an office and staring at a computer can be exhausting, but it really is, especially for someone switching back from play mode. On my first day, I didn't do anything productive. Boss man was too busy to give me anything, as he was also on vacation last week, but he wanted to look over projects before passing them to me. I spent the day in limbo- not working, but too scared to do any fun browsing.

Second day was a little better. I came in to the office with an assigned task. I did not realize that the task was reading 500+ e-mails from a client in response to a subpoena. Most of the work was pretty dry, but there were fun bits too. Our client is a company that does film distribution and advertising. They were responsible for bringing some of the biggest Hollywood flicks to China. It was cool seeing how they did that. Also, a lot of the emails were personal, not business related. I read emails to wish "mommy" HBD, and also plans for bottle service "in da club", all from the same person. Ha. It felt like snooping, even though I knew these e-mails were legit for review. By the end of the day I felt like I knew this person and his colorful private life. The moral of the story here is: keep your personal life and work life separate, or else strange lawyers may end up learning way more than you care to share.

I know it's only been two days and I am still adjusting to being back to work, so I hope it get easier. But part of me is doubting whether big firm life is right for me. The pressure to be productive and churn out billable hours is immensely stressful. People in the office barely speak because they can't waste time that they can be billing. The partner really hounds you if you fall short in the first haft of the month. You get to make up for that AND keep up your current quota in the second half. I guess it all doesn't matter if you really love the work. Although who really loves sifting through 50,000 emails of your client, or writing a memo on survival clauses? Well, the intern I sit next to apparently finds it fascinating. His eyes light up the way mine do when I get my food. O the enthusiasm...

Are all big firms like this? Am I in the right place? I need to get in where I fit in.

Introductions

This post marks a lot of firsts. This is my first time blogging and my first blog post. I've never blogged before because I am really bad at keeping diaries so I figured I would be bad at blogging. But before I left Atlanta, I had decided that I would start a blog to update friends from all over the world on my new life in Shanghai. I hope I can keep this blog alive, even when work gets busy.

Tomorrow is the first day of work at my first real job. It is as exciting as it is nerve wrecking. I have been waiting for this day since March. Can't believe six months just flew by! Actually, it didn't feel like time flew during bar study hell but everything else passed so fast. Beach week, grad, first month of bar study when I slacked, and a month of vacation after the bar. Now it is all coming to an end. I shall enter the workforce as a contributing member of society and make $$$. Yah!

First impression of Shanghai is positive overall. The only downside here is everything is handled differently, even from what I'm used to in Beijing. I look pretty idiotic speaking perfect Mandarin but acting completely clueless. Also, Shanghainese sounds like German. People sound like they're fighting when they talk. It is intimidating at first but I realized that most of them are actually normal and helpful.  They sound like they're fighting with you but they really aren't.

The city is cleaner and livelier than Beijing. I like that there are Western restaurants and cafes tucked in little streets with the Chinese shops. The east meets west thing seems more seamless here. In Beijing, you'd only find Western stores in pockets where expats frequent. On my quiet little street I have everything- a brunch place that seems popular, a soon-opening oyster bar, a wine bar, AMAZINGGG famous xiaolongbao (Shanghai buns) place and a takeaway HK bbq place. The last two I have tried and loved. I am excited to try the rest too!

All the food talk is making me hungry, but I really shouldn't eat so it's sleep time! Hoping for a good start tomorrow xx